What I Pack for Adventures

Everyone asks me what I take with me on my glorious adventures. Ok, sorry, no one asks me what I take on my touristy trips where I pretend to be some crazy explorer. But just in case people ever DO ask me what I take with me, here is a list.

Travel gear - what I pack

My Gear

  1. Various currency from multiple countries. Important because you never really do know where the airplane will drop you off (unless you read your ticket and/or signs). Crucial in those moments when only Egyptian currency can be used to pay off the Nigerian man shaking you down in Guatemala.
  2. Maasai lion-killing club (called a “rungu”). Because lions are dangerous. Duh.
  3. Dirty GoPro Hero4 case. Used to keep most shots that I take with my GoPro sufficiently cloudy or blurry.
  4. GoPro Hero4. Used to take wide angle photos that I say I’ll crop and never do. Also used to take long underwater videos of virtually nothing that take up lots of memory space on my desktop computer.
  5. Gant watch with battery that hasn’t worked since 2013. Important in case I need to go out to a fancy dinner. Whenever anyone asks for the time I pull out my cell phone and tell them the battery on my watch just died that day.
  6. Perfectly clean GoPro Hero4 case that I’ve never used.
  7. Sigma 50mm lens for Canon. A really good lens that I can’t recommend enough. It creates an impressive bokeh effect and, more importantly, allows me to sound pretentious when I tell people it creates an impressive bokeh affect.
  8. GoPro pole that broke when I took it to the Caribbean. I still keep it around because if you hold it just at the right angle, the screw piece will stay in place and the camera can stay still without titling up or down. If the screw piece falls out I run the risk of losing the camera. So, uh, yeah, I still use it (carefully) in certain situations.
  9. Snorkel. For breathing, obviously. Used underwater (mostly).
  10. Canon 50D with a lens I paid a lot of money for but is way cheaper if you buy it now.
  11. Left-hand machete. Used to clear brush (not to kill jungle attackers).
  12. Nikon camera. It’s not a Canon so I refuse to use it.
  13. GoPro junior chesty. Used once in Prague while attached to my two-year-old daughter to capture 45 seconds of shaky footage of people’s feet in a church in Prague.
  14. Worlds to Explore. A legitimately good book that I insist on reading one day.
  15. National Geographic backpack. Perhaps the greatest camera bag ever – no joke.
  16. Right-hand machete. Used to kill jungle attackers (not to clear brush).
  17. Old Canon camera that makes me look like a connoisseur of cameras.
  18. Octomask with attachment for a GoPro. Like my GoPro pole, it broke when I took it to the Caribbean. Unlike my GoPro pole, I can no longer pretend to attach a GoPro to it.
  19. Lowe carrying case for GoPro cameras. Used to keep cash and memory cards (not cameras) that I can never find because they are so well hidden in this case that I always forget I only use to hide cash and memory cards.
  20. Camera used to make me look like a hipster millennial douchebag.
  21. Camera remote control. Used to take photos of my entire family without having to rely on some tourist who is bound to mess it up. It’s got a sweet rapid fire button that’s important to have when I frantically and unknowingly start clicking the button while watching my cheap and lightweight tripod (in garbage now) fall over in the wind. The photo sequence of an expensive camera falling to the ground is priceless (well, like, $2000 actually).
  22. Lens, macro I think. Never used.
  23. Expensive viewer that attaches to a GoPro Hero4. I have used it once and was very unimpressed at the poor picture quality. I have gone back to guessing at where I’m pointing the camera and hoping I get everything and everyone into the frame.
  24. Lens, telephoto I think. Never used.
  25. Underwater lens for the GoPro. Was supposed to make it easier to see the blue water underneath the surface. Key words are: “supposed to.”
  26. External hard drive. For the burst photos I take of nothing but don’t have the heart to erase.
  27. This is a lens, of course. Is it bad I have no idea what it is or what it’s intended for?

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